Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need MOBI


10 thoughts on “Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need

  1. says:

    Travel broadens your mind while it shrinks your wallet Olden day travelIn the olden days a major drawback to traveling was the fact that much of the world was occupied by foreign countries, which had no concept whatsoever of how a country is supposed to operate Many of them did not accept major credit cards Sometimes the people would not understand plain English unless you spoke very loud A few of these countries it s hard to believe this was even legal did not have television in the hotel Travel broadens your mind while it shrinks your wallet Olden day travelIn the olden days a major drawback to traveling was the fact that much of the world was occupied by foreign countries, which had no concept whatsoever of how a country is supposed to operate Many of them did not accept major credit cards Sometimes the people would not understand plain English unless you spoke very loud A few of these countries it s hard to believe this was even legal did not have television in the hotel rooms Good advice Never go outside the hotel this is one of the cardinal rules of travel Another one is Never board a commercial aircraft if the pilot is wearing a tank top Why reservations are importantWe will try to remember the famous thirteenth century tourist Marco Polo, who, having managed against all odds and with great effort to cross Persia, the plateau of the Pamir, the forbidden regions of Kashgar, Yarkand, and Khotan, and the Gobi Desert, finally arrived at the legendary Kublai Khan s palace at Shang tu, where he uttered the words that have served as an inspiration for travelers ever since What do you mean you don t have my reservation The early pioneers children in the backseat Are we there yet Hey THESE plains aren t so great Mom, Ezra is making hostile gestures at those Native Americans Are we almost there Mom Rebecca dumped some unforgiving terrain into my scarce food PLEASE can we stop here and settle Kansas please please PLEASE Yuck We re eating bison again When are we going to be there Mom Little Ben put oxen poop in his hair Foreign countriesEngland is one of four nations, along with Ireland, Scotland, and New Zealand, that make up the British Isles England is a very popular foreign country to visit because the people there speak some English.Located partly inside the Arctic Circle, Finland has long been a popular destination with travelers who enjoy the feeling of knowing that if their car breaks down, they could be eaten by wolves Finland is also the home of the sauna, which is a wooden box in which you subject your body to extreme heat, which causes you to become very relaxed, unless of course the door gets stuck, in which case it causes you to become lasagna We ourselves prefer to stay outside and take our chances with the wolves.Germany is really a very nice nation that used to have an unfortunate tendency to fall in with the wrong crowd every few decades and try to take over the world But that is all in the past, thank goodness After years of painful division, East and West Germany are finally back together as a large, vibrant, strong, dynamic, extremely powerful and heavily armed nation that we are sure will be a Good Neighbor for LOOK OUT HERE THEY COME Dave Barry gives you great advice for your holiday with these chapter headingsPlanning Your Trip to Paradise, or Possibly BeirutHow to Speak a Foreign Language in Just 30 Minutes Without Necessarily Having Any Idea What You Are SayingAir Travel Or Why Birds Never Look Truly Relaxed Traveling as a Family Or No, We Are NOT There Yet See the U.S.A First While We Still Own Part of It Traveling in Europe Excuse me Where is the Big Mona Lisa Staying in Hotels Or We re Very Sorry, But Your Chapter Is Not Ready Yet Camping Nature s Way of Promoting the Motel IndustryWelcome Home Or That s Odd Our House Used to Be Right Here Enjoy


  2. says:

    This is one of those books that I read in just one or two sittings It was that good and that short Anytime a friend or loved one of mine is going on vacation or traveling for business, I encourage them to read this book prior to their departure They almost never do, but that s their loss.Most critics will agree that this is Barry s best book followed closely by Greatest Hits Of the Barry titles that I have read, I would tend to agree It s very cohesive and contains illustrations that This is one of those books that I read in just one or two sittings It was that good and that short Anytime a friend or loved one of mine is going on vacation or traveling for business, I encourage them to read this book prior to their departure They almost never do, but that s their loss.Most critics will agree that this is Barry s best book followed closely by Greatest Hits Of the Barry titles that I have read, I would tend to agree It s very cohesive and contains illustrations that add a dash of extra hilarity to his writing.The section where he details every state in the USA They re Progressive is worth the cover price The way he details foreign countries that he has and hasn t visited are hilarious as he tends to play a lot on stereotypes, but I would read the designated section for visiting any of them to see if I agree.If you ve read anything by Dave Barry before, you know what you are going to get A quick read, a lot of laughs, and a desire for .Also recommended Dave Barry s Greatest Hits Dave Barry is Not Making this Up


  3. says:

    The 1991 DAVE BARRY S ONLY TRAVEL GUIDE YOU LL EVER NEED by the aforementioned Dave Barry is as funny today as it was when it was first published Sure, the world has changed but that is mostly due to wi fi, the internet and those instant coffee machines with the little cups People are still the same, the countries of the world are still out there although slightly rearranged, and you still can t drink the water in South America, but funny remains funny And Dave Barry is funny So if you are p The 1991 DAVE BARRY S ONLY TRAVEL GUIDE YOU LL EVER NEED by the aforementioned Dave Barry is as funny today as it was when it was first published Sure, the world has changed but that is mostly due to wi fi, the internet and those instant coffee machines with the little cups People are still the same, the countries of the world are still out there although slightly rearranged, and you still can t drink the water in South America, but funny remains funny And Dave Barry is funny So if you are planning a trip and want some great advice, get a real guide book But if you want to stay on the patio, grilling burgers and swatting flies, here is your introduction to the world Warning Take the advice offered in this book at your own risk You may hazard splitting sides, rude stares from your neighbors on the bus, or soda snorting out your nose Read at your own peril Remember, you were warned


  4. says:

    Vintage 1991 mild xenophobia, mullet, and all Disturbingly, it feels like a gentler,innocent time.I will never love another Dave Barry book as much as Dave Barry s Book of Bad Songs, and I should learn to accept that.


  5. says:

    I used to wait for Dave Barry s column in the paper as a child, with his off the wall, crazy sense of humor that could take the most mundane, routine topic and help you see it in a whole new way This book, written as a spoof of typical travel guide books, did not disappoint me I actually think he wrote it while either highly intoxicated, or high on something Nonetheless, it contained much humorous misinformation, such as how to tourniquet a poisonous snake when camping, or how much custom a I used to wait for Dave Barry s column in the paper as a child, with his off the wall, crazy sense of humor that could take the most mundane, routine topic and help you see it in a whole new way This book, written as a spoof of typical travel guide books, did not disappoint me I actually think he wrote it while either highly intoxicated, or high on something Nonetheless, it contained much humorous misinformation, such as how to tourniquet a poisonous snake when camping, or how much custom agents love tips , plus useful phrases that could come in handy in a foreign country when traveling, such as the German for, I have got my mojo working Anyone that has experienced the joys of traveling with children in a small car, or air travel would totally relate to his useful tips This was a light hearted piece of nonsensical humor that did not require much concentration or involvement


  6. says:

    When things get too serious, Dave Barry is always a perfect way to lighten the mood and give a solid belly laugh or two This book is no exception.


  7. says:

    Dave Barry is a funny, weird guy He never fails to make me laugh.


  8. says:

    I read a lot of Dave Barry books in high school As all cool kids do So of course I had to get this when I saw it at a library book sale I didn t enjoy this as much as I ve enjoyed his other books the jokes got a little tired after a while But it had its moments.


  9. says:

    I don t usually give a book a two star rating, especially if it s from an author that I like, but boy, this book is a bore It s almost as if Barry didn t want to write the book.


  10. says:

    Mr Barry delivers humor once again This is a must read before your next vacation Two thumbs up


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Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need TAKE YOUR TRAVEL TIPS FROM DAVE BARRY,A GUY WHO IS REALLY GONE Complete with maps, histories, quaint local facts France s National Underwear Changing Day is March, song lyrics, helpful hints on how to get through Customs all insects must be spayed , and tidbits from Dave Barry s own fond vacation nightmares, DAVE BARRY S ONLY TRAVEL GUIDE YOU LL EVER NEED is just that You ll find everything you need to know in this incredibly comprehensive reference, including Air Travel Or Why Birds Never Look Truly Relaxed Traveling as a Family Or No, We Are NOT There Yet Traveling in Europe Excuse me Where is the Big Mona Lisa Camping Nature s Way of Promoting the Motel Industry

  • Paperback
  • 192 pages
  • Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need
  • Dave Barry
  • English
  • 15 November 2019
  • 0345431138

About the Author: Dave Barry

Dave Barry is a humor columnist For 25 years he was a syndicated columnist whose work appeared inthan 500 newspapers in the United States and abroad In 1988 he won the Pulitzer Prize for Commentary Many people are still trying to figure out how this happened.Dave has also written a total of 30 books, although virtually none of them contain useful information Two of his books were used as the basis for the CBS TV sitcom Dave s World, in which Harry Anderson played a much taller version of Dave.Dave plays lead guitar in a literary rock band called the Rock Bottom Remainders, whose other members include Stephen King, Amy Tan, Ridley Pearson and Mitch Albom They are not musically skilled, but they are extremely loud Dave has also made many TV appearances, including one on the David Letterman show where he proved that it is possible to set fire to a pair of men s underpants with a Barbie doll.In his spare time, Dave is a candidate for president of the United States If elected, his highest priority will be to seek the death penalty for whoever is responsible for making Americans install low flow toilets.Dave lives in Miami, Florida, with his wife, Michelle, a sportswriter He has a son, Rob, and a daughter, Sophie, neither of whom thinks he s funny.